Rainy Saturday bliss: a simple equation

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Toaster oven-scale roast chicken and veg

 

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Gravy, obviously

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Tiny bread pudding

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=

Shanglows

You know when it's tough to live in Shanghai?  When you wake up needing the kind of day where you quietly go about your tasks, listening to your iPod and, should you feel ambitious enough to cook, reflecting about what you might make for dinner later.

It's all fine if you can spend the day at home watching Seasons 1-5 of Project Runway.  (Oh, it's happened.)  But when you have stuff to do, there's just no way to do it without getting sucked in by the city's frantic pace.  I'm talking about an end-of-the-conveyer-belt-into-the-slaughterhouse kind of atmosphere.  There's noise.  There are people.  There are people's elbows.

Here are the two things that put me over the edge, and by "over," I mean, "in need of," and by "the edge," I mean "an ice cream cone to bring me down":

1.  Yup, I speak Chinese.  I went shopping for Christmas wrapping paper down on Fuzhou Lu.   

ME:  [in Mandarin] Hi, how much is this coloured crepe paper? 
VENDOR:  Three kuai [RMB].
ME:  Oh... hmm - [about to explain that I usually buy it for one kuai - which is true - but will offer him one-fifty]   
VENDOR:   [to other salesperson]: Stupid foreigners.  You can charge them anything.
ME:  I can understand everything you're saying.
VENDOR:  [ignoring me and holding up three fingers.  In English:]  TREE!  TREEEE! 
ME: [still in Mandarin]  Forget it.

2.  Um... thank you?  I took my usual Line 2 back home, crushed against a pole by the rush-hour crowd.  These women were so intimately close to my body that when they spoke, I could feel the condensation from their breath on my neck. 

WOMAN 1: This foreigner's scarf is a strange colour.  [It's mustardy yellow]
WOMAN 2: Yes.  It makes her skin look worse.
WOMAN 1: But she is nice and pale.


Let it be known that Baskin Robbins' Cookies 'n' Cream ice cream is as effective a sedative as any.  And now, back to Project Runway.

Siiiiiick. Blegh.

Healthy readers,

Today is my third day in bed after being struck full-force by the angry fist of The Worst Cold In The World.  Delicate sniffles?  Soft Victorian coughs?  Nope.  Half-closed, red, puffy eyes?  Maximum-velocity sneezing that makes my head snap back?  Exhaustion of my ENTIRE supply and back-up supply of hankies?  That's more like it.

But you know what's great about being sick?  Having full license to watch total,  unadulterated, crap on DVD.  Yayyy!  I have so far viewed, or at least had playing in the background while I passed out open-mouthed: Eclipse, The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants 2, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, and Bride Wars.  I also threw in some Curb Your Enthusiasm (which has ironic humour) but only because I ran out of Gossip Girl.

Now.  A few boiled dumplings, some ginger tea, and back to bed I go.  Please beam immune system virtual boosters!


(No photos today - there's nothing you want to see here, I promise.)

Hello (again), world

Yep, it's been a year since I last posted, thanks to blocks on Blogger, Twitter, Facebook, and other things that help people network and organize big events. Like craft parties and potlucks. Or, I guess, protests and rallies. Anyway, I found posting remotely really wasn't my thing. It's like painting without your glasses - you have a general idea of what you're doing, but no satisfaction in seeing the finished product.

BUT! I've just purchased a program that lets me get online through other, less internetically-inhibited cities. As such, I'll be posting regularly, and in a fancy new layout to boot. And to catch everyone up, here's a summary of the past year:

• PROFESSIONALLY: (Very) full-time job doing marketing and events for a non-profit. Learned tons, worked really hard, and finished my year-long contract in June 2010. On the side, I helped my friend Bonnie develop local baking service Sweet Bon-O-Mine. These days, I'm working for self taking assorted contracts and moonlighting as a private English tutor, like every other half-pat (locally-employed expat) here.

• PERSONALLY: Expanded the cast of Claire's Life with new friends, all of whom will surely make their way onto the blog at some point. I've also solidified relationships with People In My Neighbourhood (PIMN), which goes a long way towards making me feel at home here, like when my DVD guy thrusts out the latest romantic comedy when I ride by him on my bike. (Oh, and people, I don't discuss my dating life online. It makes people uncomfortable. Especially me.)

• OTHERLY: Still in my darling apartment, which now features both a couch AND bookshelves. Shazam! // I spent almost three months in Canada this summer. // I'm rocking new glasses like Anastasia Krupnik's, though I still wear my usuals when I'm feeling unobtrusive. // My Chinese is way better than it was. Now I can discuss way more than my ideal husband. // I bought a new camera and am in love with it. // I still suck at cooking, but I sure can make a mean pot of rice.

So, I'm back. Thank you for staying around, and always tell me what you'd like to hear more about - I am nothing without you, dear readers!

- Claire

Drumroll, please

Congrats, Carla! You totally found the voice of Mr. Too-Cool-for-Poodle, and as such are the winner of the caption contest. I shall be mailing you something weird and cute. Keep your eye on the mailbox!

Crazy busy these days with volunteering (this time for a local theatre company producing a night of one-acts); baking with my new friend Bonnie, who's started her own small business; and studying. I'm really starting to look forward to coming home this summer... anyone up for thrift shopping marathons or long, leisurely afternoons perusing the shelves of London Drugs, let me know.

Sweet, sweet cupcake success!

Finally. After a string of failures culminating in the Chocolate Cupcake Disaster of March 29, I've pulled cupcakes out of my oven that aren't dense, vinegar-flavoured messes. I've chucked my Six-Minute Chocolate Cake recipe out the window in favour of Katie's accurately-titled Never-Fail Chocolate Cake:

1.5 c white sugar
0.5 c cocoa
2 c flour
1.5 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
.75 c oil
1.5 c milk
2 eggs
1 tbsp vanilla

Mix all in bowl. 350, 35 minutes in greased 9 x 13" pan, or about 10 minutes for cupcakes. Easy!

I also concocted some super-yummy chocolate icing. The process was something like this: put cocoa and a bit of butter in a saucepan, mix over low heat, adding as much milk as necessary to make stirrable. Take off heat and mix in enough icing sugar to make stiff. It's not scientific, but it's certainly delicious: more chocolatey than sugary.

The cupcakes' success may have also been aided by the wee wrappers they are snuggled in. Check them OUT! I can't even handle the baking supplies here; I just found out that I can order 10,000 customized wrappers for, like, $100. That's a lifetime of "CTB"-swaddled baked goods, people!

Project 2: Dinner chez moi

Midterms finished on Tuesday, and Julia and Poppy came over with the idea of cooking a real. Dinner. Like, with courses. The theme? Carbs and butter. So Julia made her trademark and highly delicious onion soup with freshly toasted croutons; I made macaroni and cheese and a side of potatoes mashed with spinach, to break up the beige colour palette; and Poppy concocted her Scottish bread-and-butter pudding, which took two hours to bake but which was entirely delectable, especially when eaten with cream whilst watching "The Sound of Music." We sang along, obviously.

Spot my new favourite cutting board under the (somewhat superfluous) slices of baguette.

Also included: produce bounty. This is what you can buy at the fruit/veg market down the street for just over three Canadian dollars. Note delicious mango at centre stage.

Photos:

1. Another reason to love China: I can afford my vitamins
2. First course: soup, croutons, and wine from the Open House caterer, who was so horrified that we usually drink Y30 bottles that he gave us a much nicer one to take home
3. Macaroni and mashed potatoes baked toaster oven-style: that means double-decker skillz
4. Second course: Julia means business

Project 1: Opening House (not mine)

Every night before I go to sleep, a soft but chiding voice whispers, "You forgot to write your blog tonight, Claire." My toes twinge with guilt and then I drift into slumber, forgetting about the whole thing until the next night at around midnight. Why do I do this? I just saw "He's Just Not That Into You" and Justin Long says it's because my life lacks real drama so I have to create my own. I don't entirely agree, but at least I don't have to take up gambling or, like, catfights in bars.

So what have I been doing the past two weeks? Kind of studying for midterms, but mostly organizing this Open House party for the Community Centre (I insist on CDN spelling) of Shanghai, an organization that helps expats form, um, community in this ginormous city. The Centre offers all sorts of classes, social events for youth and for grown-ups, tours, counselling, etc., etc. It's a really cool place and they just opened their brand new office about a twenty-minute bike ride from my apartment.

About six weeks ago, I decided to volunteer there and was immediately recruited to help party-plan, which I had no problem with; although the whole thing was super time-consuming, I can't pretend I don't love choosing decorations, harassing people to RSVP, and trying to hang unwieldy banners on sketchy walls that shouldn't be depended on to hold ANYTHING up. Some photos below - mostly of the Hongqiao Flower Market, one of several in the city that offers beautiful, gorgeous, stunning flowers basically for free. The party was last Saturday night and was super-successful, despite my and my co-organizer's fear that only ten people would come and everyone would win three door prizes before we packed the catering into Tupperware to be eaten cold every night for the following week whilst reflecting on our failured attempt at entertaining. What a relief! Though the leftovers would have been great.

Photos:

1. Just one of the beautiful flower market stalls
2. This guy did our welcome table arrangement in seven minutes flat. Bam!
3. Julia wins a doorprize, tries to regain focus
4. Party favours
5. Typical: women organize, men cut the damn ribbon

It had to happen sometime:

the ubiquitous "Funny Chinese Signs" post. Hey, I'm not making fun of anyone for messing up a foreign langauge; God knows how many Western lower backs are tattooed with "cow" or "cultural appropriater," not "strength" or "harmony." But these Shanghai signs were too good not to share, and I think you'll agree that the best ones are actually due to the visuals, not the written content.

Update on me: I lost my wallet last night (no, NO!) and with it, my local and foreign bank cards, my student ID, my health insurance card, and the best passport photo of myself that has ever and will ever be taken. (It's for my own good, it was making me vain.) But my Matt & Nat wallet? Low blow. I'm pretty sure it dropped onto the floor at Starbucks, where someone scored it before I realized it was gone. I feel like an idiot.

Good news: Lindt chocolate bars are on sale at my grocery store for Y9.99 ($1.82 ). Hoardhoardhoard!

Photos:

1. This culinary delicacy is available a mere half-block away from my apartment
2. Fine print: *manky baby costumes may compromise cuteness*
3. Not sure how "Chunk Fun" got past the Lipton PR team
4. Prado Frappuccinos to follow
5. Erm.. hard to know. Points for cute diaper icon

PS. Does everyone know you can make the photos bigger by clicking on them?

Claire and the toaster oven: a love story

Yikes! Has it been that long? I guess I was too busy making tiny muffins in my new OVEN! (*Wild applause, cheerleaders cartwheeling*) Chinese apartments don't come with ovens - even the lucky foreigners who think they've rented a place with one often find it's actually a little dish sterilizer. Alas, my kitchen had neither, and I've been stirfrying, boiling, and sautéeing (badly) for the past six months, staring pensively at the place where an oven should be. In the baking aisle of the imports store, I would slow down my cart, eye the baking powder and sigh disconsolately, knowing my kitchen could produce nothing that needed puff.

But then! Two weekends ago, Poppy and I were at a Huaihuai Lu (French Concession shopping mecca) department store and found a scratch-and-dent table bearing highly discounted appliances, including a very reasonably-priced, generously-sized toaster oven. Poppy graciously listened to me pro-and-con for ten minutes before basically suggesting that I do the only sensible thing and buy it. Which I did. I haven't looked back. Especially as I now have a reason to buy hundreds of the great cupcake wrappers I found at a wholesale place down the street.

Any recipes not involving too much butter or chocolate welcomed; it's hard to think of what to make without them, I know, but they're really expensive here.


Photos:

1. There she is, at home in my pantry!
2. Check out my balanced meal. That's macaroni and cheese (cheddar AND blue cheese, snap)
3. Darling cupcake wrappers
4. Eee, carrot-pineapple muffins!

Chinese cuisine: the highs and the... less highs

So my friend Katie is going home to Minnesota tomorrow, having had enough of the programme here and wanting to get her life started in the States. I'm going to miss her a tonne because (among other reasons) her love for Starbucks and for sarcasm at art openings is rivalled only by my own. Anyway, I always think when you want to say something, you should say it with food - so we took her out to eat hotpot. A lot of hotpot. At this particular restaurant, every customer gets her own little pot of broth, which is brought to a boil by a tiny flame underneath. Everyone shares the raw ingredients, which you throw liberally into the pot, fish out a couple minutes later, and devour after dipping into one of your two custom-made sauces. It's pretty much heaven. Lamb! Beef! Green vegetables! For once, a meal with vegetables AND without oil.

Conversely, if you feel like fried carbs with an extra shot of cholesterol, you can always head to one of the bazillions of pancake stands on the streets here. This one by Donghua University is probably my favourite, because the guys crinkle the pancake at the end with such zeal (see blurry hand movements). The process: first, they mush one of those fatter, smaller dough patties flat on the grill, then crack an egg on top and flip the pancake over, rubbing more grease into it than one would think possible. At this point, you can opt to add bacon, but I usually shy away as I never like to overdo it. (Clearly.) When it's all cooked, there is a flurry of pancake crinkling - perhaps to add volume before the hot sauce is added. Finally, the whole greasy mess is swaddled into a little paper bag and you're sent on your way to figure out how to eat the thing and still look at least a little dignified.

So, Katie, look what you're missing in Minnesota. On the other hand... eat a salad for me!

学校 (School)

Hi everyone,

Sorry I disappeared for a couple of days. I got kind of homesick and dropped all lines of communication - which is kind of the opposite of what one should do, but I'm working on it.

So... despite what my postings may thus far suggest, Shanghai isn't all shopping trips and cozy parties. I'm here on a CCSEP, or Canada-China Scholars' Exchange Programme, scholarship, and as such spend my mornings studying Mandarin at Donghua University. This has to be one of the sweetest deals offered by the Canadian government - though it's in tandem with the Chinese gov't, so I shouldn't give Ottawa all the credit. They have covered my airfare, tuition, books, and a decent monthly stipend, and would also be giving me accommodation if I didn't mind living on campus with some cockroaches. Yes, the application process was lengthy, but it didn't require anything other than a couple of reference letters and a willingness to jump some hoops.

All language students are required to take three classes: Listening, Speaking, and Intensive Reading. I'm not really sure why they divide up the classes like this, as we listen, speak, and read in all of them - though I love imagining putting on earmuffs and blindfolds at the beginning of Speaking classes. Listening is the only class I really dread - we listen to recorded sentences and then try to work out which of the answers in our textbook makes sense. The hard part is that many of the characters in the answers are new, and that those of us in the class who weren't brought up speaking/reading an Asian language have a hard time keeping up. I'm often only halfway through understanding what the answers even mean before the tape rolls, someone chirps "B!" and we've moved on to the next question. This is bad for confidence and also for friendly relationships with "B!"-chirpers. :)

Classes run from 8:30 to 12:10 every day. We have two subjects per day, and two 45-minute periods of each in a row. Sometimes the time really crawls, but finishing school at noon every day always feels fabulous. My class is a nice group of people; most of the students are Korean, with the rest of us from Turkey, Japan, Poland, and Germany - and me, from Canada (there are only two Canadians at Donghua, me and a boy I've met a couple of times). Once a month or so the International Students' Assocation organizes Chinese Corner, an hour and a half of language practice with local students. This past Tuesday's theme was Street Chinese, which, disappointingly, was about traffic safety and not Asian ebonics.

Donghua's campus is quite lovely, with lots of trees. The Teaching & Research Building, where we have classes, is one of the nicest buildings - old red brick instead of a greyish tiled exterior. On the first week of school, a giant inflatable archway welcomed new Donghua students (literally: Welcome You, New Donghua University People!), and at Autumn Festival, the courtyard was lit up with Christmas lights and lime and violet floodlights. I can't believe I didn't take a picture!

Lots of love. And if you know anyone who might be interested in CCSEP, let me know - this is really a fantastic opportunity to study in China without worrying how you'll finance a year away.


Photos:

1. School gates, first week of school
2. Our classroom
3. Our class bulletin board, which won First Prize in the Interclass Bulletin Board Decorating Competition (see certificate at upper left)
4. The Teaching & Research Building
5. Chinese Corner

My Saturday routine

Weekends in Shanghai mean people, lots of people, everywhere. I always tutor from 1:00 to 3:00 over in Pudong (Shanghai, like Edmonton, is spliced in two by water, and Pudong is on the far side of the Huangpu River), and negotiating the crowds on the metro trip there and back is an experience unparalleled by anything in Canada. Sometimes I try to imagine what situation at home would compel people to cram themselves through doors as passionately and unapologetically as they do here. It's like the Strathcona Farmers' Market, only the same amount of people have to squeeze into one-tenth the space. And it's Christmas Eve, and there is a turkey shortage so there is only one free-range turkey left. And everyone's elbows are extra-sharp, and most people are a little shorter than usual so the elbows really get into your ribs.

The blurry photo below was the best I could do before the camera was knocked out of my hand (fortunately into my bag).

Before squeezing into the metro, I had a fantastic morning wandering around a little artsy area called Taikang Lu, where a lot of artists moved to take advantage of the cheap rent a few years ago and which has, predictably, become somewhat gentrified. Among the little shops, though, are old row houses whose original occupants still hang out playing chess outside and washing their clothes in giant, bright-coloured plastic bowls. It's a really strange mix of trendy expats and far less privileged Chinese people, and I don't feel comfortable describing it (like my guidebook does) as "charming" and "off the beaten path" when really, it's a cluster of kind of decrepit alleyways with Chinese residents that probably don't have money to rebuild or even repaint. I do think Katie had a point, though, when she said that at least it's one historical part of town that isn't being sacrificed for a new condo.

After doing a bit of Christmas shopping, I took a cab to the closest metro station. Refreshingly, the ride was beautiful - we were in the French Concession, which has gorgeous old trees hanging over the streets. I wished I could have wandered around instead of teaching in the afternoon, but alas, there is rent to pay!

Grandma, I will write more about school this week. Thanks, everyone, for your comments - they're really fun to read and make me feel like an Important Internet Presence.